Visiting the UK

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28 Nov 2012 4:31 PM by camposol Star rating in Camposol. 1406 posts Send private message

I often hear people say that that they have never been back to UK since moving to Spain. OK if you don't have any family or friends there, but It set me thinking-

Don't they have family they want to see? Some say-they know where we are! If I didn't go back twice a year, and my family visit once a year, I would never see them. Skype is good but will never substitute.Don't  people miss their children, grandchildren?

Some run down the UK, NHS, prices etc without having been back for years-how can they judge?

Some never watch British news or TV-whoever said you had to give up everything British when you moved to Spain?

Bet they won't be so anti UK when they can't cope out here!

 





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28 Nov 2012 4:40 PM by bobaol Star rating. 2253 posts Send private message

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Having a bad day, camposol?




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28 Nov 2012 4:43 PM by camposol Star rating in Camposol. 1406 posts Send private message

Not at all- just observing





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29 Nov 2012 7:15 AM by guslopez Star rating in Lorca, Murcia.. 745 posts Send private message

I havn't been back for 7 years now. Last time was for fathers funeral & then daughters graduation.  It doesn't hold any interest for me.

When we lived there we never saw anyone so what's the difference ? Skypes ok but what do you find to talk about ?

You don't need to go back to know what prices are like. They were dear enough when I left so , even if they haven't risen in 12 years, they are still dearer !

As someone who'd prefer to live in a motorhome I certainly wouldn't be rushing back there if/when I can't cope. It's too cold here at the mo so I certainly won't be going back there.



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30 Nov 2012 12:36 PM by mac75 Star rating in Valencia. 414 posts Send private message

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 I don't think it has anything to do with "giving up" anything.  If you find what you need in a place different to the UK, that's all that matters. It obviously wasn't that important to you in the first place or what you have found has simply substituted what you had and for those who don't go back, it has obviously been for the better. The thought that people "give things up" when they move abroad is a typical point of view that some hold thinking that Britain is intrinsically "better" than any other place (I am not including giving up family members here), almost as if Britain was the "real" world and everything else, or Spain at least, isn't anything more than a "second rate" country. Clearly those that share this frame of mind shouldn't ever leave Britain. I have felt this sensation of superiority from many people who constantly suggest " Why don't you come back?Surely you will be better off in the UK? You can't be in Spain forever"

 



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30 Nov 2012 1:15 PM by bobaol Star rating. 2253 posts Send private message

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 Totally agree mac75.  If people moving to Spain are going to "miss" things, why move in the first place?  And why would moving to Spain make any difference whatsoever?  Do those who move back never leave the UK again?  I can't see the problem as we do travel to UK a couple of times of year and it's cheaper on the plane than taking the train in UK.  We have grandkids and we go to see them.  They come to see us.  We still go on holidays just like we used to from UK.  In fact, we are off to UK next week to take the Christmas presents etc.  Only for a week, though, as we want to get back home which is now Spain. 

The biggest problem are those for whom something has gone wrong, or they miss their families more than they thought they would, or don't like being talked to in a foreign language, or bought in the wrong place or any other combination.  It then starts preying on their minds and Spain is then at fault for absolutely everything.  "I have to get in the car to travel ages to the shops, it's all Spain's fault".  No, buy somewhere closer to the shops.  "It's too hot in the summer and it's all Spain's fault".  Sorry, this is ludicrous.  Did they not check out the weather first?  "It's too cold in my house during the winter and it's all Spain's fault".  Again, I must be lucky as our house is lovely and warm in the winter.  Maybe because we asked the people living here about the quality of the build before we bought.  "It's expensive in Spain and it's all Spain's fault".  What they really mean is the UK currency has fallen so much that it appears more expensive and they still insist on using the pound in their heads.  No complaints when the pound was 1.60 or even 1.50.  But because a loaf of bread at a euro was 60p but is now 80p then prices have shot up in Spain.  No they haven't.  That loaf of bread is still a euro.  

If you really want to know how people blame Spain for all their problems, have a quick read of one or two of the "blogs" on here.  I did once and firstly got so depressed that I felt like this must be the worst country in the world.  Then I realised they were written by bitter and twisted who are simply trying to justify the mistake they made by blaming it all on Spain.  

But, whatever you do mac75, never tell them that you are happy with your choice, never tell them that you quite like it here, never tell them that you are enjoying your way of life.  You will be accused of being smug, complacent, blind to the world and, with absolutely no sense of irony whatsoever, you will be told that you are stupid for actually making that decision in the first place.  You will be told that UK is heaven where you can buy online and have it delivered (of course, this is impossible in Spain), you will be told that it is only in Spain that bureaucracy exists and its all put in place to frustrate the Brits.  Why can't they drive their UK registered cars over here without being stopped by the police?  Why can't they speed and not have to pay the fine?  Why do they have to carry ID around with them when they don't have to in UK?  Why shouldn't they be entitled to free care on the Spanish NHS but still be able to go back to UK and use that free healthcare as well?  Why should they have to pay for an interpreter when UK provides them for free? (never sure if they're complaining about the NHS or the Spanish system when I hear that one).  Why isn't the value of my house doubling every year?  

My question would be "Why move to a foreign country for a better way of life and then try to make it as much like UK as you can?"

 

 





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30 Nov 2012 1:49 PM by camposol Star rating in Camposol. 1406 posts Send private message

What I can't understand is  people living out here who haven't gone back to the Uk for years to see their children  and grandchildren( unless there have been huge rifts, which is sad) I realise  the family may visit Spain for holidays, but these are at the most expensive times of the year for flights, so many can only manage 1 visit.





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30 Nov 2012 2:18 PM by bobaol Star rating. 2253 posts Send private message

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 How many people have you actually come across that don't visit UK?  I know guslopez says he hasn't been back for a while but I would suggest he is in the minority.  Everyone around here, regardless of being British, Finn, Norwegian, Dutch etc, all go back to their own country at least once a year.

For us, as I said we are back next week to take the presents home. In Feb, my brother and sis in law are visiting, March we are off to Florida for Caribbean cruise and will take the opportunity to add on a few days in UK.  Easter my daughter and two kids are visiting here.  June my parents are coming over for a month (before the tourist influx really kicks off), August my other daughter is visiting with her kids.  The biggest break we have is Sept to Nov.  I'm pretty sure most people are like that.  

Plus, with grandkids growing up, I'm now in the position where two of them can fly out by themselves when they want to visit.  Not everyone will have kids and grandkids only of school age.  

 





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30 Nov 2012 2:20 PM by camposol Star rating in Camposol. 1406 posts Send private message

Bobaol-its not as black and white as you seem to make out.It's possible to love Spain itself while being unhappy about  aspects of it.

It's ridiculous to say, Why move to Spain in the first place if you are going to miss things. To not miss things would mean you are not human.Every0ne misses something, whether it's children, the seasons or favoutite beer!

No-one comes here with the idea that Spain causes the their problems or that UK is heaven.You can't know what a place is truly like until you've lived there a long time. No one expects a house in Spain to be freezing in winter-bully for you if yours is nice and warm. No-one knows if they will be able to tolerate the intense heat of August until they have experienced it. Some of us (like myself) learn the language, re register the UK car, inform  the DWP, NHS and HMRC that we are moving to Spain etc. We don't spend our life in search of bacon and eggs. I notice that ssome of those who drive uk cars, don't pay income tax here are the ones who go on about moaning Brits. If we think prices are cheaper/dearer from our own experience, we are entitled to say so. We don't blame Spain for every problem, but find some ex pats are hyper sensitive to the merest criticism of Spain, defending it fiercely. Many people have suffered injustices they would never have done in UK, due to not being able to find the right help and support, and though some may have been naive, some have  suffered at the hands of unscrupulous lawyers, estate agents  whom they have previously researched.

 If something is wrong, unjust illegal or inefficient anyone has the right to be unhappy about it, whichever country they are living in. Some are apathetic, as long as they are all right,jack etc. Some are realistic.





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30 Nov 2012 2:39 PM by camposol Star rating in Camposol. 1406 posts Send private message

Actually I;ve met quite a few people who I know have family but haven't been back at all. I can only assume they are not close, so don't miss them much, or there's been a family rift, or can't afford it.. Some Say("they know where we are, they can come out here". As I said before,flights in  school holidays are  the most expensive. It's not only the price of flights to consider though; from Spain there's the cost of travel to the airport, spending money while over there and of course most people like to contribute to their stay plus  like to spoil the grandchildren.Then of course there are all the things you can't buy in Spain, or are cheaper in UK. It can work out to be a pricey trip


Spain



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30 Nov 2012 3:07 PM by johnzx Star rating in Spain. 5242 posts Send private message

I have lived in Spain for 25 years.

I have not been back to UK for over 6 years and no intention of ever doing so again. 

I don’t miss a thing.

My children come to Spain to visit as they too love it here and would like to live here.





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30 Nov 2012 3:29 PM by Harry07 Star rating. 205 posts Send private message

I sense someone has had a few tough breaks in Spain & thats unfortunate !!





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01 Dec 2012 2:39 PM by camposol Star rating in Camposol. 1406 posts Send private message

Unless parents can both get the time off together, (often very difficult,) and have enough money to fly out to Spain every school holiday(very expensive at peak times) then I fear most people living in Spain do not see their children as often as they would like. No doubt they would say that is the pain for the gain!

I am curious when people say they do not miss a thing about the UK, or have no wish to fly back. I can't believe that Spain is so superior that it meets every need!

 I have to say that I have not had the huge misfortunes that some poor people have had, rather a drip, drip  that has worn me down and  left me weary of Spain, though I do actually love many things about it. One person on Camposol commented that she had an embargo on her house, which is classed as touristico,( giving rise to many problems) no deeds, and once had a threat of demolition , yet she is a cheerful soul, who loves it here. Faced with the same problems, I don't think I could be the same!





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01 Dec 2012 3:07 PM by tamaraessex Star rating in Colmenar, Malaga. 508 posts Send private message

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Camposol it's odd that you use language such as "I can't believe that Spain is so superior it meets every need" and that you repeatedly say you don't understand people not visiting family in the UK. It seems to me you do not (or cannot) recognise the plethora of different experiences that exist here in Spain, and are able only to view things as though filtered through your own experiences.

If Spain is meeting our needs, that is not to say it is "superior", just that we have looked at our own unique and individual needs, and have decided that they are best met by living in Spain. If we had overwhelming desires to see family members frequently, we wouldn't have made the decision that our meeds are best met in Spain.

Some of the "happies" here visit the UK often. Some don't. Some of the happies live by the sea, some don't. Some of the happies live in inland villages, some don't. Some mix mostly with other immigrants, some don't.

Surely the point is, that what separates out the happies from the miserables, is not which of those choices they have made - because of course one set of "right solutions" is not someone else's. The point is that the happies are people who know themselves well enough to have created a life that works for them. It is not to be pushed onto others, or waved around as being "superior" to other people's choices, it is simply about knowing ourselves.

I'm sorry you don't understand why everyone doesn't have the same outlook as you do. Personally I'm rather relieved most people DON'T share my outlook - I'm relieved that the majority of immigrants into Spain prefer to live in urbanisations near the sea or in isolated villas in the campo, because that leaves the cheap little village house available for me! But my choice wouldn't work for others. I think you might stress yourself less about other people's choices if you accept the enormous breadth of differences that exist in the human race!


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01 Dec 2012 3:14 PM by johnzx Star rating in Spain. 5242 posts Send private message

Tamara,  Spot on





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01 Dec 2012 3:20 PM by GuyT Star rating. 511 posts Send private message

 Perhaps I'm sentimental. I am 63 years old, my wife 57. I was educated at boarding school in UK and did a few years in the UK army. Otherwise I spent my life everywhere. Early childhood in Malta, Singapore, UK. Teens in West Africa, Soloman Islands & Aussie (my dad was a pilot). Several years in the 60s/70s travelling  in South America. 15 years in Southern & Central Africa on and off - where I met my wife and later on we became a farmers in the Cape. 6 years in the USA  in the 80s where our kids were born. A few years on and off in UK sort of filling in the gaps. 4 years of late in Spain. We don't know whether to stay or not. The USA beckons me, as does Malta. My wife loves Spain and wants to stay put. But we always go back to UK perhaps 3 times a year as a couple - even though my wife has no connection other than our 3 kids who live there. I go a few times more each year as we have business interests.  UK is a solid base - sort of like having money in the bank - you look at a country like Spain where they haven't paid a lot of our Spanish govt worker friends in months - and think, could that happen in UK? I don't think so. In fact, anyone on the Finisterre out of Balboa this Sunday send me a pm and we'll enjoy buying you a beer. I love everywhere, even Zimbabwe, which they destroyed in front of our eyes. Life is great - make the most of it.

 


This message was last edited by GuyT on 01/12/2012.



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03 Dec 2012 8:48 AM by guslopez Star rating in Lorca, Murcia.. 745 posts Send private message

GuyT

01 Dec 2012 15:20
 Perhaps I'm sentimental. I am 63 years old, my wife 57.

 

You certainly don't look it !!!  Built that barby yet ?

Hop you are both keeping well.

 

Back to topic. When we moved from London to Devon it never ocurred to me to " go back" visiting ?  I would occasionally have too but needed to know well in advance to be able to cover the time off. I've always worked 12+ hours a day /7 days a week so a weekend off A) was loss of earnings , B ) costs money . 

Now I'm not working I don't really want to spend money that I can ill afford doing something that I don't really want too, cannot see the point in & really don't want to return due to the cold & depressing weather. A grey day here is bad enough , fortunately we hardly get many , but 2 in a row is losing the will to live !

I've only ever worked & now I'm not unfortunately, & with no interests it is quite boring. Even if I won the lottery tomorrow it wouldn't even occur to me to visit the UK & if I did it would only ever be in July or August.

I have no desire to visit any other country even for a holiday , which I've never seen the point of in all honesty, & only took in the UK for the sake of the wife & children.

My brother lived in Germany for 40 + years & he & I never visited each other. I had never even seen his house until I went for the funeral.

I find it peculiar that people find the need to constantly be on the phone/visting etc; each other ?



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04 Dec 2012 2:33 PM by camposol Star rating in Camposol. 1406 posts Send private message

I must admit I am surprised that so many aren't bothered about vsiting the UK, even when there is family there-rather sad, too. 

Guz lopez-I don't find it peculiar that people want to visit,phone skype people they love/like -just peculiar that you do!





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04 Dec 2012 6:02 PM by guslopez Star rating in Lorca, Murcia.. 745 posts Send private message

Camposol : I have no idea what I would find to talk about ?



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