Elegance Dona Julia.

I know that everyone is different and have different ideas about family life and what is important etc............but on the whole do the people on this forum whom have children feel that they made the right decsion moving to Spain and if they could change anything what would that be?

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We moved over when our kids were 2 so the actual move wouldn't have affected them much. 

As I work for myself I see my kids a lot more than I ever did in the UK and they are also really happy in the local Spanish school. 

The kids love the wonderful play parks that we have by the beaches and as it gets hotter we spend nights out eating and going for walks which is great.  We never used to do that back home.

From the kids point of view I think we did the right thing, definitely.  It's a much better way of life for kids here.  The beach, the pool, the parks, they are all great and you can enjoy them all for free for many months of the year.

Justin

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I agree with Justin. Our daughter was 10 when we moved here three years ago. She is bright and would probably have passed her 11 plus and gone to grammar school had we remained  in England.  As she's an only child and had known the same home, friends and small Anglican school all her life we decided to be gentle with her and chose an international school for her rather than plunging her in at the deep end into the Spanish system. Just as well, as although we did all we could to reassure her, the anxiety in the build up to the move caused her to have panic attacks. Once here, she settled in quickly, made lots of friends from all over the world and is doing brilliantly with her studies. We chose the particular school, Aloha College, because they offer the International Baccalaureate as an alternative to A Levels. It's a broader curriculum, encourages self-motivation and the qualification is highly respected by universities.

Our daughter's life is more independent and action-packed than it would have been in England. It's more family orientated here; you see 17 year-olds playing football with 6 year-olds and granny sitting on the bench watching. And that'll be after they've all been to church together. It feels safer here and it goes without saying that there are more opportunities to be outdoors (roller-blading on the front in February springs to mind). We wanted her to have the freedom we enjoyed when we were young (all those years ago!), going to the park with friends or wandering down to get an ice-cream at the local shop - unimaginable in the UK.

I would say that Spain has been a great experience for our daughter and I am delighted she's had the chance to enjoy some of her childhood here.

 

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Same as you, we've been able to keep our UK home. A bolt hole. Quite sure we will NOT be using it!
Tell me ? Where in the UK would you feel comfy if your child went and had a chat with a single male in a bar?
We've done the right thing.
Enough said?
Fiona

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Hi Kez74

Great question, i ask myself that everyday as we are moving out soon with a 2 yr old and 4 yr old.

Thanks for the encouraging replys

Tina

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Rose1 (was it Rose or Smiley posting, I wonder ?) That was wonderful to read. I could visualise the different aged kids larking about with their football with an elderly person enjoying watching & it certainly reminded me of my own youth. If anything's going to persuade families to move over for their kids sake, your post is. Loved it.  Say hi to Tessa for me please too.

Janice

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Hi All,

I totally agree with Rose1 and others as I educated my daughters in Spain for the first 1O years of their education,although they are now 21 and 22 I don't think that anything is any different. We had to return to the UK for family reasons a few years back and what a difference it was putting them back into a UK school. Many times I was on the point of returning them back to Spain as they were so miserable but they settled down, as kids do, and I think this was because they had a very good start in life., it was a wonderful life for them. It is true that family life is different which we saw with the families of the girls' friends.   All age groups mix more and there is more respect for the elderly.  All in all my daughters have grown up to be lovely individuals of whom I am so proud and I think this is in no small part due to wonderful time that they had in Spain. In fact, they both think of it as home and in fact Spanish is really their first language as they were taught to read and write in it!  I'm sure that they will both return again once they have finished Uni and decide where they are going in life.  As we are now in the process of buying off-plan I can see us all back again.  Good luck to anyone thinking of moving out!

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These replies have been a real comfort for me to read..as i have read some really horror stories.

I have four children, by the time we move the oldest two will most likely have finished school......so that will just leave the youngest two who will probably be about 7ish and 5ish.

I think that i might just put them in a Spanish school and see how they get on. We will be learning some Spanish before we come.

I think we have decided on the Coata Blanca, just not sure which area..obviously alot of that will depend on how good the schools are in each area. If anyone has any information on good schools on the costa blanca i would be most grateful.

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Kez 74 Hi,

Don't know any schools on Costa Blanca, but I wish you all the luck with your move. Let us know how you get on.

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hi kez 74

i have two children 8 and 18 months ,my concern is only my son  8 years old who begs me everyday not to move to spain ,but after listening to other replies and a couple of friends who have already made the move and the local papers about hoodies maybe its worth the risk.after all its too hot for hoods in Spain.

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Hi kez74,

I have my children in Algorfa School a spanish school on the CB.

As a parent the biggest concern in moving countries will always be the children.

I can safely say the school is fantastis and absolute breath of fresh air,the standards both educational and social are outstanding,there is no bullying,no violence,they are only allowed to take healthy food in for their lunch as chocolate and crisps are banned and the teaching staff are fantastic,they actually create a bond with the children.

When we first put our children into the school it is very daunting as they only speak spanish and you feel cruel that you are dropping them in the deep end,after a few weeks they are begging to go to school in the morning.

The children soon make friends both spanish and english and when you are invited to parties as the whole class does to every birthday party you sometimes feel humbled by their family values and respect as i fear this has dissapeared greatly in the UK.

in my opinion you can rest at ease as your children will be given a great start to their new life.

Regards

Georgia

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Hi Georgia,

 

You are so spot on !  It is us ,not the kids, who are crying.  I can back-up all you've said.  I think my daughters are so well grounded due to the excellent time that had at school in Spain, it is not just the education, as you rightly say it is the social aspect as well. After seeing the news today about two women encouraging toddlers to fight in a UK school, I know where I'd send my children!!.

Regards

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Hi everyone,

I am looking for information on Childcare in the Manilva area.  I am looking to move to that area and work in Gib, but I can't find any info on afterschool childcare or childminders, can anyone help.  I am also struggling with the idea of putting my kids into Spanish School, they are aged 13 and 10, would an international school be considered a better idea for this age group?  Does anyone have any info on the part state, part private schools, this may be an alternative.

thank you for any help you may be able to give me

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We moved to costa blanca this year when my daughter was 8.we live in a small mostly spanish village called Hurchillo near oriheula.our daughter goes to a spanish school there with a few other british kids and after a shaky start she loves it.I cried leaving her there her first day wondering if we had made a terrible mistake,but 3 months on with our own business and daughter settled in well at school,we know that we have not.                                                                                                                        EILEEN.

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I find myself very jealous of you all being so sure you have made the right decision. I have been here since January with my family and still find my self questioning what i am doing. I do not seem to feel as settled as those around me and still crave my home surroundings. I love the sunshine, the people and the thought of the life people tell me it should create for my daughter but despite all this i find myself missing my home, friends and simple things.

Didnt anyone find it hard adjusting to being away from 'home' and feeling 'settled'? If all replies are 'no' then i am in trouble.

I found it easy to just drop into a play zone at home with my daughter and her play with other babies, talk to mums about whats happening and compare notes. Get hints and tips. I have found my self searching for such a place near Marbella and still havent found anywhere that seems to offer this. I work full time and my mum is looking after my daughter full time, i dont really want her going to a nursery yet without us but find my self having to look at doing this just so she has some children to interact with. Even at the swim classes i take her to no one seems to 'chat'.

Is it just me I wonder adn i am looking in the wrong places.

 

 

 

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Hi Matilda- really felt for you when I read your message and I hope other forum members can help you out. However my sister in law found herself in a similar position some years ago after moving to the USA- even though language was not an issue going beyond a 'hello' clear'y was. She put her email number on a card and started an 'Moms club' by putting the cards in various store windows suggesting meetings at various parks, fast food play area's, outdoor pools and even a particular table at a summer fete. Always public places to begin with- it worked and some of the Mum's she met eventually have been god parents to her third child.

Meanwhile I have to say that our experience of living in the UK and having our children in schools there hasn't been a morass of hoodie ridden crime. We like Spain because the weather is great as are the people and we enjoy spending time there but the whole of the UK isnt a lost cause.

This message was last edited by JHMurcia on 6/23/2007.

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We are in the process of moving to a place near Velez Rubio in Almeria. My Daughter is 16, just finished her exams and wants to continue on at 6th form. At the moment we are worried about moving out and finding her a place in a school over there with 6th form or college. we have heard great things about the schools and how the kids adapt well, but they start from a young age.

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Matilda...YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!

A huge number of people cannot settle here.  You've "only" been here 6 months so it's no surprise you still wonder whether you have done the right thing.  We have been here 3 years now and Susan (my better half, this is her blog) still has moments when she gets itchy feet. 

Over the past 3 years we have lost more friends than we've kept due to the fact so many have returned to UK as they just haven't been able to settle here.  Some people never will.

We have a series of articles that we've written all about moving and integrating in Spain, the real stuff.  We'll be sending them out in our newsletter very soon.

You have to keep at it for a bit and never think yourself a failure if you ever decide that Spain isn't for you, at the end of the day it's not for everyone.  But a least you will have given it a go.

Justin

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Mick28

Are you saying that you want to move your daughter here to finish off her schooling?  I'm assuming you would be looking at international schools.  Have you found any in the area?

Justin

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Awkward fitting in, isn't it?  Everyone will be feeling the jitters when they first move, even those who have been visiting for several years.  I am having them myself, even though I have had a holiday home on the CB for 5 years, about moving over permanently next year.  Fortunately, and coincidentally, I found an ex friend of mine from the Army (who I haven't seen for almost 30 years) had moved about 2 miles away from me in Torrevieja.  They moved over permanently some 6 or 7 years ago.  His wife told me she wanted to pack up and go home after 3 months, had the same feeling after 6 months but, after a year they came to the opinion that they would never go back to UK.  They said they had made more friends in the years they have lived there than they ever did in the 20 years since he left the Army and lived in UK.  They are now absolutely loving it in Spain and say they wish they had made the move years ago.

The sad fact is, a lot of people who move abroad (be it Spain, France or wherever) move back within 6 months because they feel they don't fit in.  A lot of these people are ones who have moved to the "real" country and find they are left isolated in a totally new community.  This is why the "little Britain" urbanisations are so popular.  At least you can speak to people in the same situation without being overawed by the totally new way of life and language.  Not that these are ideally suited to everyone, of course.

My advice, for what little it's worth, is to stick it out.  I have a feeling I will see more of my family when I move over than I do now.  I live 130 and 170 miles respectively away from my daughters and family because of work.  I always have to make the journey and no-one comes to visit me because "it's too difficult".  I guarantee I will get the "we've got a week off at the end of whenever, any chance of visting?" phone calls.  Plus I'm looking forward to meeting many new people as the social life in Spain is obviously a lot better than here in UK where a second mortgage is necessary for an evening out with drinks and a meal.  Even on my visits at the moment I have got talking to a lot more people than I ever do in my village in UK. 

Of course, if you are desperately unhappy and have somewhere to go back to in UK, then do so.  It's pointless making yourself ill with worry and stress if you feel you cannot fit in.  Any groups you could join to meet people?  Things like  - British Legion, expats societies, theatre groups, whist clubs, keep fit classes - anything that you enjoy where you can meet people.  I know the Costa Blanca News is full of such associations and they are really worth considering.  Even going to car boot sales and chatting to others may be the first step on the ladder.

Whatever you decide, the best of luck and hope you find what you're looking for.

 

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