The parents fault and not spain faults ???

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09 Jan 2011 12:00 AM by kez74 Star rating in cheshire. 50 posts Send private message

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I have been looking a varies websites whilst researching a move to spain. What i find hard to understand is people whos opinion is that moving to Spain will result in our children becoming wasters with no propects, hanging around drinking and smoking. But surley that is the fault of the parents and not Spains fault ! That happens to children every day in the U.K, again at the fault of the parents, isnt it more to do with how you raise your family than where you live??

Also by moving to Spain you home is more likey to get broken into, more likey to get robbed, pick pockted! all scary stuff ! but again isnt this the case all over the world ! ??? Surely its not all doom and gloom over there !


 



This message was last edited by kez74 on 09/01/2011.



This message was last edited by kez74 on 09/01/2011.



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09 Jan 2011 2:34 PM by Sanchez1 Star rating. 853 posts Send private message

Youth unemployment (those under 25 years) is 40% in Spain at the moment, so prospects are grim for young people here.



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09 Jan 2011 2:35 PM by JazII Star rating in Mar Menor and UK. 133 posts Send private message

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 Actually in our view it's far safer walking out late at night in Spain, the kids are much more courteous and yes there is crime but most of it is opportunity crime........for example would you leave your front door and/or windows open in the UK.  Would you leave your handbag outside whilst popping in for a drink......

I think people are scare mongering you ;-)

That said, I agree the economic prospects are pretty dire right now but isn't that the case around much of Europe....... 

 





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09 Jan 2011 6:33 PM by Roberto Star rating in Torremolinos. 4551 posts Send private message

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How old are your children? I think the age at which they move can make a huge difference.

 



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09 Jan 2011 6:38 PM by kez74 Star rating in cheshire. 50 posts Send private message

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my children are 16, 15 ,9,7  although the old two will most likey be a year older when we come. They are good kids and would rather stay in than hang around the streets drinking with their peers.





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09 Jan 2011 6:59 PM by Roberto Star rating in Torremolinos. 4551 posts Send private message

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They might be happy to stay in, but surely some day you'd like them to get jobs? I was thinking along the lines of, if they're not yet 3 they will grow up totally bilingual and accustomed to the two cultures etc. in which case, yes, it's down to the parents. But at these ages, especially the older two, what hope have they of ever attaining a decent level of fluency in Spanish and integrating with their "peers"? This is not a negative reflection on Spain. And I mean no disrespect; no doubt there's much more to your story than you've given so far - I just wonder what hopes and aspirations you and your children have for their futures?



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09 Jan 2011 8:28 PM by nitram Star rating in castalla. 175 posts Send private message

I agree with Roberto your 16 & 17 year olds are going to really struggle, they will never get ajob unless they work in a family company if you are to start one up, then there is the market world for ex pats you have to have that really outstanding product that others or the spanish have not got and want.

I´m sure that they will not stop in all the time and not speaking the lingo will neve intergrate that is the reason people come over and live in Spain for .Remember Spain has the highest rate of unemployment in europe and like ireland and greece goverment have money problems

However your other 2 will fair better at a spanish school to learn the lingo and intergreat, personally familys moving over here the best age to bring children is under 10

We have found in our area familys with teenagers don´t last long (average where i live is 2 years) then they go back to u.k.

 

However we don´t know your circumstances and may be lottery winners, we love it and children if they left school now could hold their own yes they have spent more years in a spanish school then a u.k one, but it would be the same if we went back now.

Don´t worry if all this sounds negative with out sites like this some of us had nobody to speak to or ask questions about certain matters and just had to get on with it, good luck





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09 Jan 2011 10:36 PM by jek Star rating. 249 posts Send private message

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You look to suggest that parents are to blame for all the negative things that you read on your websites and, in one respect at least, you are right.  Many parents have come to Spain to live their dream - not the dream of the children but the dream of the adults.  And you look to be falling into exactly the same trap.  How can you say that your children will benefit by being uprooted from their friends and wider family and a culture and environmernt with which they are familiar? 

I assume that the elder two will not be going to school in Spain and are likely to be unqualified or, at best, have a few GCSEs.  They have no chance of getting a job here - as someone has pointed out 40% youth unemployment and your kids are not Spanish and don't speak the language.  Not a chance!  You really are condemning them to a pretty miserable existence.  In the UK there are opportunities and schemes for vocational training and apprenticeships from which they will benefit and increase their employment prospects.   Bring them to Spain and they will return to the UK as soon as they are adults and leave you to it.  And they won't be thanking you.

I don't agree with others on here and I say that the best time to bring kids to Spain is aged 8 to 11 but only once they are fully literate in English.  They will learn Spanish very quickly and they can go through secondary pretty much bilingual.  But if they are not literate in English when they come here they never will be.  Between 99% and 100% of parents who come here with preliterate kids swear that they will work with them to ensure that their English language skills do not suffer.  Between 0% and 1% actually do so.

So, as the responsible parents that you clearly are, you can justify bringing the younger two - just about, although the overall benefits are not clear - but no way the elder two.  Their future should be in the UK.  So what's more important - your dream or your kids? 

Sorry if this comes over too strong but I don't think we do you any favours by pussyfooting about.





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09 Jan 2011 10:38 PM by kez74 Star rating in cheshire. 50 posts Send private message

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I didnt mean to make it sound like they never go out..they do of course but the people they choose to surround themselves with arent the type of teenagers that hang around getting up to no good given the choice they would rather stay in. It is obviously something to think about and how the move would effect their futures is a massive consideration. Jek your points are exactly what i wanted, the truth from people who know !! maybe a holiday home..for now !



This message was last edited by kez74 on 09/01/2011.



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10 Jan 2011 10:19 AM by EOS Team Star rating in In Spain of course!. 4015 posts Send private message

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Some very good and honest points there.

Yes, much of the problems with the expat kids here is down to the parents.  Many have selfishly dumped their kids in Spanish schools with them not being able to say anything other than "hola".  When they are very young it's fine, but when they are teenagers it's not.

Many expats think that just living in Spain is all they need to do to give their kids "a better life".  It's simply not like that.

Integration is tough, prospects aren't great and parents can't help their kids if they can't even communicate with the teachers.

Justin



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10 Jan 2011 10:33 AM by goodstich44 Star rating in northampton. 1648 posts Send private message

Justin/jek

how refreshing it is to read balanced opinions about day to day life in Spain, good and bad. I realise it's human nature to justify one's choices, but so often comments on here are based on a strong dislike and unbalanced bias against the UK, rather than the reality of the pro's and cons of moving to, and living in Spain. Keep it up!





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