Life in Spain through the eyes of a tourist

I do not know whether you are aware of this little fact or not, but just in case you have planned to visit the heart and the south of Spain this summer, pay attention and read carefully: it is hot!  If, for example, you have an apartment in Seville, you should take a look at this survival guide, unless of course you feel like dying from dehydration.

• Rule #1: Never move more than fifty meters away from a fountain unless you bring some water with you.
• Rule #2: Never fall asleep at the beach.  That is suicide; spontaneous combustion!  Well, a night in a hospital at least.
• Rule #3: You have to be really mad to go for a walk between 12-7pm.  There is an extreme risk of being stuck to the asphalt if you do.
• Rule #4: Who minds if hats were never your thing?  Your brain sure is and you would like to continue to use it, do you not?  So, protect it!
• Rule #5: Take advantage of the evenings.  Nothing is quite like a Spanish summer night.  Before those delightful hours it is almost impossible to speak.
• Rule #6: Have you ever heard of pescaíto frito?  You cannot abandon this world without having eaten it with an ice cold beer.  Thus, you are only allowed to leave your apartments in Seville at midday if it is for this reason alone.  But, make sure you take a fan and the bar where you will be has a spot in the shade for you.  Otherwise, your ice cold beer will turn into soup in about three minutes (and the fish will be over-cooked).
• Rule #7: Remember sun screen is your best friend.
• Rule #8: Do not be ashamed of sweating, everybody does it here.
• Rule #9: Do not go into the water when you are drunk.  Yes, I know is tempting, however you can be embarrassed the rest of your life in a matter of seconds when you realize that an old lady has saved you and you are naked in front of the eyes of dozens of people.
• Rule #10: If you have been clever enough you will have chosen your Seville apartments with a terrace.  So, it is a must to enjoy a sunset barbecue with your friends on said terrace before leaving.