Lonely in Spain, most people in the UK wouldn’t dream that these three words could exist in the same sentence. Well, it’s true, there are lots of lonely expats in Spain. Loneliness can affect anybody, at any age, whether they are in a relationship or not. In fact, most people who relocate to Spain will at some point experience an episode of loneliness. Relocating to another country is a major change and will affect your mood and hormones.
It is natural for individuals or couples to feel lonely far away from friends and family until you make new friends. The truth is you could be feeling lonely for a while since it can take time to make new friends. It is difficult to know who you can trust as there is no way of knowing about where people have come from and what their intentions are until you get to know them. So in that sense you may feel a little vulnerable which can accentuate the feelings of loneliness.
When you look at other expats, they all seem so established and settled so you wonder why they would want to be friends with a newbie like yourself. And, it is true that some people do not want to be “burdened” with new people trying to find their way so tend to avoid them.
You may find that people are falling over themselves to strike up friendships with you but although you are surrounded by people, you can’t help thinking about your old friends who really know you and may start to question why you left them behind to start again. Making new friends can be hard work especially when you go through rejections and let downs or you discover elements of people’s lives and characters that you don’t like.
As, I mentioned before, loneliness can affect anybody:
Teenagers who have been brought over by their parents, coping with adapting to new surroundings, school and raging hormones.
Mothers with babies and young children who are missing the support network of mums and babies groups and health visitors.
Single people who have come here to work full time whilst establish a social life at the same time.
Single, divorced people who have come to retire or semi-retire.
It is especially affects partners in unhappy relationships with problems.
People who have lost a partner whilst in Spain.
The thing is people just assume that everybody else has an abundance of friends and a full house with the phones constantly ringing. The truth is they too are waiting for the doorbell to ring or an invitation to coffee, it’s just sometimes you have to make the first move to find out that people are willing to make friends out there.
Written by
Susan Pedalino
Women in Spain blog