Mac's Poll - Let's Vote

Tamara said:
Wednesday, November 21, 2012 @ 4:58 PM

Yes I find them more friendly to strangers / foreigners (because that's the comparison - we can't compare the friendliness of our British neighbours to us as British people). The people in my street genuinely want me to have a good experience - it's their pride in their village / region / country - they want me to experience the best of it, and they play their part. So in the power cuts everybody rushed round with candles, knowing I was new and may not have any. About half a dozen of us women stand out in the street in our slippers nattering over a cuppa in the morning. They help me improve my language, and I help the one who is learning English. Just now a neighbour passed me the phone number of a good plumber who won't charge me "precios de extranjeros" because she's told him I'm her friend.

Patricia (Campana) said:
Wednesday, November 21, 2012 @ 5:16 PM

A definite yes. Then again I have lived in Spain practically all my life and my husband is Spanish. From day one I found the Spanish people very helpful, kindly, not to say entertaining and outgoing.

Gerald said:
Wednesday, November 21, 2012 @ 11:05 PM

I don't really know as I have not yet lived in Spain however from occasional dealings with Spanish people find them good people & have no problem speaking to them. But then I have no problem with British people either - unless they are behind the wheel of a car!

mac75 said:
Thursday, November 22, 2012 @ 8:09 AM

Maybe we should do a poll on who are the better drivers!

Tamara, It is a difficult exercise of self-criticism as a nation and how prepared we are to help, full stop.Whether the strangers are foreigners or not. Clearly, once friendship has been established it's pointless to compare which friends are "better friends". I think the key lies in the "time line" I am British and and I know both the British and the Spanish but I feel from my experience of living in the UK and Spain, that the Spanish in general are more likely to offer to help, invite you into their house and make you feel more at home much quicker than the average Brit. This is not a negative observation, just a different way of thinking.

Bruce said:
Saturday, November 24, 2012 @ 3:34 AM

I am an American (USA type, in case you distinguish between peoples of "The Americas") have lived (2.5 years) in and visited England many times and have a niece and grand nieces there. I have met many English people here in Spain during the 19 years I have lived here, as well. In my experience the English have been very friendly and helpful. I feel a special bond toward the English and even have English roots going back about six generations, for whatever that might mean, psychologically. In all honesty, however, I must say that I have found the Spanish in every corner of the country to be even friendlier than the English (and Americans, for that matter). Their willingness to share what they have, even when it may be little, to chat and openness in doing so are truly notable and it was so even back when I was still learning to speak Spanish using verbs in the infinitive form only.

michael said:
Saturday, November 24, 2012 @ 6:45 AM

I penned an article not so long ago; the response was heated on both sides. I would say it can be a regional as much as a national difference. Liverpool people have a reputation for friendliness; not so in the aloof south. I lived in Mijas Pueblo, as a resident for 7 months; there was acceptance but little warmth. My many non-Spanish friends, some of whom lived here for decades, say the same.
Much depends on individuals. I know several Spaniards; one a medical receptionist; another Correos official: If they were your only contact with Spain you would have a fervent desire to nuke it. Others of course are helpful.
For many there is a touching romantic hippy-like devotion to Spain. Sunglasses are a common spectacle in Spain; so are rose-tinted spectacles. How often I hear the refrain; ‘the Spanish are so welcoming.’ Well they would be if you enter the restaurant with a fistful of dollars. Try them in an environment where cash isn’t changing hands or is not their cash; there’s your true Spaniard, warts an’ all.
Spanish bistro owners are known for two prices; local and ‘tourist.’ Straight lawyers as rare as hen’s teeth; most local government functionaries barely function and do so with appalling bad grace. Corruption is rife; the postal service doesn’t deliver; their broadband is slow-band.
Notorious for racist chants at sports events they don’t do non-Spanish relationships. I don’t know a non-Spaniard who has dated Spanish crumpet, let alone married one. I heard of one Brit who did so. They have kids and he’s gone native but still referred to as ‘the foreigner.’
Friends of mine came here as a young family in the 1970s. Had kids; school yet have never been invited into a Spanish home. Many tell you the same thing.
Non-Europeans, not just the Brits, are criticised for failing integrate: we all know plenty who have tried and been rebuffed. We HAVE mostly tried to learn Spanish. Every time we try to use it we’re breezily told; ‘”it’s okay: I speak English!” You stop trying in the end. You can’t win.
On the Costas many Spaniards owe their livelihoods to EU largesse, tourists and northern European retirees, but are reluctant to show appreciation. I have heard exasperated non-Spaniards declare their frustration and say that without the northern Europeans much of Spain’s Mediterranean coast would be similar to Italy’s Adriatic coastline; fishing villages, wine and citrus plantations.

Annie said:
Saturday, November 24, 2012 @ 8:12 AM

I would say that, superficially, the Spanish are more friendly on initial meeting but I've found it difficult to establish relationships of any depth with the people in Spain. Having lived in many countries, I've never come across this before. The British, on the other hand, take a while to get to know but, when you do become friends, that friendship is one that will last.

mac75 said:
Saturday, November 24, 2012 @ 8:25 AM

That's a very interesting comment Annie

Nick Dobie said:
Saturday, November 24, 2012 @ 8:34 AM

When I went to Torremolinos a couple of years ago I was shocked at the way I was treated by the Spanish there. I meet an English man who lived there who told me that they don't like the English in this part of Spain. We are regarded very similar to Pakistanis back home. It is where the English first settled buying up all the land and the locals resent it. But, he said, the rest of Spain love us because of what happed under Napoleon. I don't know if this is true but that is what he told me.

Philip said:
Saturday, November 24, 2012 @ 10:57 AM

What goes around comes around. How well you are treated very much depends on how well you treat others. It's true of any country or region. But if you expect everything to run the way it runs in your own country, forget it. Watch, listen & learn how things run here and adapt - yes that's you adapt - you joined their country & culture not the other way around. When you find a good guy/gal and later need someone else, go back to the good guy/gal - they will be very eager to recommend other good people. So gradually your network grows of good people. Takes a while but the rewards are so worth it.

Just one little snippet for you. Last week we were invited to dinner at a Spanish friends house - the first time ever & we've been here 4 years now. It is very unusual for the Spanish to invite non-family to their home - a cultural thing (same in Norway actually). So this was especially welcome as it might mean that we have become more than friends, we'll see.

No rose tinted glasses here. If you want a list of everything that isn't perfect, I can do that too. However we have chosen to live here and LOVE it, warts and all. My glass is more than half full!.

Saludos Cordiales

frank said:
Saturday, November 24, 2012 @ 11:14 AM

They are arrogant and racist

Graeme said:
Saturday, November 24, 2012 @ 11:20 AM

Philip, your 1st sentance says it all...

I lived in England for 7 years and have been here(Spain) for 7 years...i would say people were helpful in England but the same can be said here, maybe a tad more.

Back to Philip comment..

We have been invited many times to Spanish celebrations with a variety of families(spanish)...probably easier for us because our children are in local spanish children...

In fact, i have been invited more times to spanish families than i have to an english family.

Cheers
Graeme

PJ said:
Saturday, November 24, 2012 @ 11:58 AM

There is no such thing as "the Spanish". Probably there is no such thing as "the British" either. I have lived in Asturias and Catalunya. In both regions, the locals are quiet and hard to get to know. But once you are your friend, you are a friend for life.

It is very different down south.

I can only compare from trips to the UK , but I always found the british very,very welcoming and helpful.

I think this poll suffers from the fact that it is asked to (mainly) British (I am Belgian by the way). You can´t ask about the friendliness of your home country. There is always a bias towards negativity.

Mish Mash said:
Saturday, November 24, 2012 @ 1:36 PM

I have recently returned to the UK with my family after living in Spain for 6 years. We lived just outside a very Spanish village, and we were one of only 4 foreign families whose children attended the local school. My daughter was 4 at the time so she went straight into the Spanish school system. No-one in the village spoke English and my husband and I made every effort to learn Spanish and I even joined in the local sevillana dancing in the fiesta in the summer. The teachers were lovely and patient with us, the Spanish were polite but kept aloof. There were some times at the beginning when we were ridiculed for our Spanish which I can understand would put people off, but for my daughter's sake I tried very hard to integrate, it took us nearly 2 years to get the Spanish to agree to her friends coming to our house for her birthday parties, and to this day I have never been invited into a Spaniard's home (apart from when I was teaching them English). There were 2 mums who were kind and made the effort to talk to me, but that's as far as it went. After 3 years we had to return to the UK for 8 months due to family illness, when we finally went back to Spain, only those 2 mums bothered to ask where we had been. I agree it is possibly a regional thing, we were in the Alicante region at that time but when we moved further south for a while and were living in a proper town, not a close-knit village, I found the people much more open and willing to chat. I think it is true that the Spanish are very family orientated, and because they have such a good family net-work they don't need to bring outsiders into their home. My daughter is an only child, and we had no other family in Spain so it was important for us to mix with other people, and as we were in Spain I did try and integrate. Although my daughter loved being in Spain, she is loving being back amoungst her family as they make a fuss of her and she feels she belongs, but I would also say that she has been invited to her new school friends' houses here much more often than she was in Spain and my husband and I have a group of friends here who are made up of different nationalities even though we have a good family net-work around us.

PJ said:
Saturday, November 24, 2012 @ 2:05 PM

I understand Mish Mash, but it is a cultural thing. I have been living in Spain for 5 years now, and inviting someone to your home is only for family and friends for life. It is not a part of social interaction like we do up north.

I think it is easier to build up a social life in the UK (or Belgium). In Spain, people have their inner circle (family, long time friends) that is hard to break into.

But that does not say anything about the friendliness though. I think it is again a cultural thing. Here, in Spain, people find it easy to interact with strangers, they don´t think "what do you want from me ?".

Pinkie said:
Saturday, November 24, 2012 @ 2:11 PM

I live in the Murcia region and from day one we were made to feel welcome. I am a 53 year old black Trinidadian, who has lived in England for over 43 years. I can honestly say that all my neighbours in England who were very friendly were, either Iranian, Paskistani, Indian or from Kenya. I have 3 very good English friends, but have yet to make one in Spain in 3 years living here. Generally I find the English ( I can only speak for the zones I have visited.or lived in.) apart from the over 65years are very warm and wonderful, the younger ones and my own age group most ly unpleasant , to the point of rude. In fact around Europe, the Germans and Swiss I have found to be wonderfully friendly and the South Africians ( especially the white ones ) any holiday I have been , extremely warm, and have made many friends on holidays.

Macha said:
Saturday, November 24, 2012 @ 5:12 PM

What happens in Spain is no different from what happens in the UK. If you move into a small village and live there a generation, you will still not be considered a 'local'. If an area is overwhelmed by foreigners, speaking their own language, eating different food, imposing different customs, it is resented by indiginous people anywhere.
My experience in Spain has been a joy. I was helped and shown around from the time I arrived 12 years ago and I'm invited to Sunday paella by my Spanish neighbours often. I'm also overwhelmed by boxes of oranges from them for at least six months of each year. But perhaps it's because I'm Irish!!

Patricia (Campana) said:
Saturday, November 24, 2012 @ 8:49 PM

Not sure what is meant by "Spanish crumpet", (thought crumpets were an English food). Not sure what "going native" means either. That is a very very racist remark and if you arrive in Spain or any other country with that attitude people will feel it before you even open your mouth.
In any case, Michael, if it so horrible, then why live here. I am just asking....

Anyhow, I do know of English (and men from other European countries) who are married to Spanish women. And in my own country, Ireland, I know a number of couples where he is Irish married to a Spanish woman. Why not?

My husband is Spanish. From when I first came out here, many many years ago, the majority of my friends and acquaintances were and are Spanish. Even before I married I was often invited to Spanish friends' homes.
I never saw anyone being particularly "cash-orientated only" as Michael seems to imply. Sure, you get all kinds in every country, but if you meet people half-way, be open-minded, they will do likewise.

I don't know where this idea of the two-tier price arises either. Certainly, as you find everywhere, there may be some "wide boys" but that is not the norm.
It is bad to generalize.

I will however, have to say one thing here. Spanish people often say to me: why are the Brits so "antipáticos". So, these perceptions work both ways. I try to explain they are not all like that, that sometimes people can appear stand-offish without being so, and so on.

Nikky said:
Saturday, November 24, 2012 @ 11:39 PM

Our house is in a small white pueblo in Andalucia that we can only afford to visit once a year. People on the street are wonderfully welcoming and friendly when we return and smile amd chat in the street and our neighbour is more than helpful... They changed the electric meter in our absence and we couldn't understand it, she basically took us by the hand!
I know that in England (my birth country though I now live elsewhere) it can vary so much depending on the part of the Country you live in. My father's family moved to England during the Russian revolution. He was the only one of his siblings to have a British accent the others all sounded decidedly foreign. My aunt and grandmother eventually moved to Cornwall in the 50's where they were considered foreigners/outsiders until I would say the 80's. After 30 years they became "locals" and part of the flavour of the village in which they lived. I remember visiting and not enjoying the very cold reception they gave me until they realized I was a relative of "Sam" ( short for Seraphima). Cornwall natives seem very close knit and certainly wouldn't be friendly to outsiders the way they are in our town in Spain.

mac75 said:
Sunday, November 25, 2012 @ 11:00 PM

well the results seem to speak for themselves. I have been giving this question lots so thought one the weekend and as much as some may consider the Spanish the be superficial or even arrogant and rude, I feel from my 19 years of experience with the Spanish that those who have had negative experiences have been rather unlucky. There are idiots in all parts. I also feel that it probably depends on where you establish yourself in the country. We all know that there are parts of the country that have been swarmed by Brits one the last 20 years, this undoubtedly makes these areas particular hot spots for annoyed or angered Spanish, although considering the "invasion" of foreigners one would have expected it to be much much worse. I don't feel these areas show the true Spaniard, for example Torremolinos. I am sure if your only experience of Spain is a holiday hot spot, you are missing out on the authentic Spaniards. They are welcoming, generous warm hearted and very helpful. On the whole, they'll open up their house to you very quickly and not in a superficial way. Like all relationships that can last a life time it takes two to tango and the Spanish are no different. If you don't give, you won't receive. But it is very very common for the Spanish to have a large group of lifetime friends going back to early childhood. They are more social so it is probably much easier to keep these friendships alive. Just from being in Spain I think I have become a better person, it is contagious. I think I am more generous, more open minded and certainly speak my mind a lot more than I did in the UK. That is something that I love a bout the Spanish, they tend to speak their mind rather than not saying anything in case they offend you or talk behind your back. Sincerity is of prime importance. They are also more emotional and not at all afraid of showing their emotions, even the men. Of course they are all types but it is a trait that I have seen to be more common in Spain than in the UK.

Patricia (Campana) said:
Wednesday, November 28, 2012 @ 1:47 AM

A ver sensible summary, Mac.

And I fully agree:

"If you don't give, you won't receive. But it is very very common for the Spanish to have a large group of lifetime friends going back to early childhood. They are more social so it is probably much easier to keep these friendships alive. Just from being in Spain I think I have become a better person, it is contagious. I think I am more generous, more open minded and certainly speak my mind a lot more than I did in the UK. That is something that I love a bout the Spanish, they tend to speak their mind rather than not saying anything in case they offend you or talk behind your back."

Scott said:
Sunday, October 6, 2013 @ 1:35 PM

Problem is that Britain is made up of 4 countrys, some countrys being friendlier than others ie Scottish are more friendly than the English, Thats a joke BTW!... Then there is the fact that spain has a whole load of different cultures ie Catalonia, Basque. So its a really really hard call to ask who is the friendliest. If your honest you know different regions of the u.k and spain have different manners and different levels of friendliness.

Hilal said:
Tuesday, February 17, 2015 @ 5:17 PM

I work with Spanish people. They have three excellent features: honesty, professionalism and friendly nature. The most friendly Europeans I met so far.

local yokel said:
Wednesday, April 1, 2015 @ 10:41 PM

Brits have no bad press in Spain, but there's a barrier called language. But Brits are rather popular but then again comes language. Spanish have a soft spot for Irish..and your pompous British tourist are also popular, but then, the language.

local yokel said:
Wednesday, April 1, 2015 @ 10:50 PM

Had the Armada accomplished its goal..all Brits would know some Spanish beyond cervessa pour favour.Hey, I don't blame them..they have every right to live hoq they pleased...they were the first tourist to come after the war when we were starving. I believe that Brits are similar to Catalans.

Rahul said:
Friday, April 17, 2015 @ 2:21 PM

Yes, not just the Spanish, every European country I have visited has friendly people. I have lived in the UK for 9 years and do not have even one proper 'British' friend. They are happy to say 'hi' and 'bye' in a social setting that is all.
Whereas from all my trips to Europe (and from uni), I have so many friends that are friendly enough for me to turn up on their doorstep if I wanted. Stayed with a friends family in Germany and I felt like a member of their family. Made good friends in Spain, who proceeded to visit India and stay in my parents' home.
But I cannot think of a single British person I can call a 'friend'. There is a difference between being 'friendly' and being a 'friend' - I get that now!
Come to think of it, for all the bad rap that the British give to American tourists, I have made incredible friends on my short trips there and still keep in touch and talk mundane things everyday like most friends do.
My wife and I do not live in a segregated Asian environment - we are the only Indians in our entire postcode! We tried everything to socialize - dance classes, badminton, theatre groups - and all we see is British people forming their own groups and hanging out with each other. We always socialize with Europeans!
At first I thought it was just me, but now I know it is not so....sad really.
(Tip - the further north you go, the friendlier the people get)

Rahul said:
Friday, April 17, 2015 @ 2:30 PM

One reason I can think of is political correctness has gone too far in the UK.
One spanish guy who asked my name thought I said the Spanish Raul, and immediately quipped ' Senor, you spent too much time in the sun' because of my skin - and it was so ovbious from the way he said it, he was being friendly.
I cannot even imagine someone in the UK with the ability to make a light hearted joke like that. Its either a stiff upper lip - a polite 'hi' and 'bye' or being racistly taunted if I ever went down the wrong street. People really need to lighten up here.
Yes, we are to blame as well, because many Asians live in their own 'ghettoes' if you like. But now its becoming a catch 22 situation - The more people dont mix, the more they get ghettoed'.
I love the country and all it represents but its about time the political correctness went and people got some lighthearted attitude to life!

Rahul said:
Friday, April 17, 2015 @ 2:41 PM

Then there is the unexpected racist too.

Went into a fine dine restaurant once and heard the customer next to us say with contempt- 'God dammit, these Asians are here too - Can we ever go on an evening out without them?' - Which was ironic because it was an Indian restaurant!

These people were not your typlical racists, wearing a hoodie and driving along in a souped up Corsa shouting at immigrants. These fine people in the restaurant wore expensive clothes, neatly groomed with a posh accent and left in a Rolls Royce after their meal!

We have also met British tourists when we visit the Caribbean - initially very friendly, but as soon as we tell them we live in the UK, they just ignore us and mingle with someone else - C'mon guys at least dont make it so blatantly obvious.

We keep trying and if we even find even one British person who is genuinely friendly to us, we would be happy to take back our opinion - but after 9 years, that possibility seems slimmer and slimmer.