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I have just received a phone call from Orange offering me a deal on my home phone & internet that is around 14€ cheaper per month than Telefonica/Movistar. The other very useful (if its true) offering, guarantees an internet download speed of 15m plus. Presently I get 5m. Has anyone had any dealings with Orange concerning home phone & internet? If so I really would be thankful for a little feedback before I jump ship. Thanks.

Not much on for Brits at Cinesur, Fuengirola over the last few weeks. My lady and I are going to see 'Oblivion' starring Tom Cruise this evening, as we're getting cinema withdrawal symptoms. I'm not a fan of Cruise, but he does do 'action' movies rather well.

I am well into the third and last book in 'The Saturday Pledge' trilogy. When they are all released later this year, and early next, I wonder if 'Banned by Kindle' should appear on the covers? I must remember to mollify Kindle in the future by making no mention of anything regarding 'Gay' people.

A recent survey amongst married women asked them when exactly they most wanted sex. 89% of them stated, 'immediately after their husbands had finished'.

There was a crossword clue in the Financial Times once, that went 'Listen carefully, or, a sexual perversion' (5,2,4,4). The Answer was - 'Prick up your ears'.

It's been such a long time since I made love, I can't remember who gets tied up.......

Mind you when my wife and I do make love she always laughs all the way through, no matter what she's reading.

My first wife went around after our divorce telling everyone I always gave her an anti-climax.